ti west

Horror Headlines: Friday, January 27th, 2012

I don't even know how long ago that Rebecca Black song came out but it still rings in my head every Friday. That's got to mean something to someone. Anyone!

No real surprise here but it looks like " V/H/S", the horror anthology from Adam Wingard, Glenn McQuaid, Radio Silence, David Bruckner, Joe Swanberg and Ti West, has been picked up by Magnolia Pictures. The film tells the story of a group of burglars who discover a bunch of weird videos in a house they're robbing. From the number of directors I assume each story will be about 3 minutes or the movie will be 4 hours long.

If there's one thing you know about me it's that I freakin love Norway. Corpse paint, trolls, and everything in between. Give it to me! So I couldn't be more excited about the trailer for the new film "Thale" . The movie is based on the mythical Norwegian charter Huldra, which is a sassy minx who lures men into the woods. Sounds fun but unfortunately the men never return. Oh and the Huldra has a cow's tail. God I love Norway.

All you really need to know about "Monster Brawl" is that it's a fake Pay-Per-View battle royal between some classic monsters and Jimmy "Mouth Of the South" Hart is in it. Now that I've got you all excited here's the bad news. Image Entertainment has decided to push back the DVD/Blue-Ray release from March 27th to June 12th and unfortunately haven't given a reason. I need a reason! Maybe it's because they're trying to get Bobby "The Brain" Heenan. Let's pray.

I don't know how much you can really believe this but Megan Ellison, founder of Annapurna Films which now owns the rights to "Terminator 5", how promised the next installment in the robot series will indeed be rated R. She let this news out via her twitter account though and I'm not positive but I don't think anything on there will hold up in court.

In Real People News: 

Ladies and gentlemen, well mostly gentlemen, and I don't really mean "gentlemen"... here is the greatest invention to ever been imagined. An aftershave specifically designed to hide the smell of a strip club.

Little baby goats are always adorable. Well not always, this one that was born with 6 legs in Europe and is an abomination and should be thrown into a lake.

Episode 193 - "The Innkeepers"

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We review the latest from the incorrigible scamp of the indie horror world, Ti West. Find out why we liken it to farts...

Purchase this Back Episode $0.99

Horror Headlines: Thursday, January 19th, 2012

I have no idea who Andrea Osvart is but from what I understand she gets acting roles because she is Hungarian and hot. Two things I will never be and that depresses me on a daily basis. So she's been cast in the new Eli Roth produced flick titled "Aftershock", a new film about the aftermath of a Chilean earthquake. Or an earthquake in Chile that is. Earthquakes don't have nationalities. I don't think so anyway. They don't talk and I have no idea what a Chilean accent sounds like so let's just move on.

Christopher Heyerdahl is apparently a guy who played a vampire in the "Twilight" films and now he's signed on to play a vampire in the HBO series "True Blood". The difference here is he's not going to sparkle so you see he's very versatile. I can already hear the direction he must be taking on the set. Alright Chris that was great, but I kind of felt like you were sparkling in that one. Can we try it again but this time, and I can't stress this enough, try not to act all sparkly?".

Liv Tyler has been confirmed to be taking the lead role in the next Ti West flick, currently titled "The Side Effect". Tyler will play woman who spends months as a part of a experimental subject for a global pharmaceutical company who finds out she's pregnant. Then she freaks out or something. I don't know I assume the movie will be 2 hours and the important crap will finally happen at around the 1:50 mark.

If you wanted to read the script for "Deadgirl 2" that will never be turned into an actual movie then I've got some exciting news for you. Scribe Trent Haaga has posted his would be sequel's script up on his blog for all to enjoy. If you're interested I've also got a script for "The Godfather 4" that I wrote a few years back when I had some downtime. It's all handwritten on bar napkins, but it's pretty awesome. I think. Honestly it has a lot of it has beer stains on it.

In Real People News: 

Dogs love toys.That's a fact. Even if that new toy happens to be a severed head that the dog found under the famous Hollywood sign in California. Inventive, you have to appreciate the dog's creativity.

I've never really understood people that get so excited about sports that they break crap. Running around like maniacs punching the wall because their team didn't score or their QB got arrested for forcing himself on a pit bull or something. And for the life I've me I don't understand this guy in Georigia who got so excited about the 49er's scoring a touch down that he decided to shoot up Applebee’s. Sports is no reason to ruin everyone's riblettes experience.

Snapshots: "The Innkeepers" - 2012

This is what every basement felt like when I was a kid...

Horror Headlines: Wednesday, January 4th, 2012

Sometimes I drink so much coffee that my mouth actually starts to get this weird sort of raw feeling to it. Like someone took sandpaper to my jaw at night and went to town. When that happens I have to stop drinking it for at least two days. During that time I'm a real prick because I love my morning coffee. It's kind of like I go on the rag. I just thought of that. Pretty clever if I do say so myself.

I don't think anyone is excited about the DVD release of "The Human Centipede II (Full Sequence)" but it's happening and it's my journalistic duty to tell you about the new box art that's been released for the ass-to-mouth opus. The hit goes on sale on Valentines day, of course, and will include director commentary, behind the scenes videos, deleted scenes and some other random goodies. And by goodies I mean stuff that will make you throw up in your mouth.

Speaking of DVD releases, it looks like the A&E miniseries "Bag of Bones", based on the Stephen King novel by the same name will be hitting shelves on March 13th. Which is surprising because I didn't realize it actually aired already. Right now it looks like the only special features being included are a couple of short features about the series, which focuses on a father wrapped up in a bitter custody battle after the death of his wife. So get ready for that hot box to hit... That's what she said.

The birth of my daughter, my wedding day and the release of "Ghost Rider: Spirit Of Vengeance". These are the three things I've been most excited about in my lifetime. I put them in that order only because I know my wife reads my news from time to time. So here's a new TV spot for the Nic Cage sequel that hits theaters on February 17th. I love you honey and I'm sorry... just about everything.

And here's a new clip from Ti West's "The Innkeepers" which has already found it's way onto VOD. If you're not up to speed on the flick it focuses on two innkeepers who try to prove their place of employment is haunted before it closes its doors for good. Anyone ever listen to that band Vison Of Disorder. I think about them every time I write about a movie that's hit VOD. Also that it's because of bands like them that I never got laid in High School.

In Real People News: 

Life is rough on the streets and when you're a homeless man who happens to stumble upon a nice piece of steak you do what you have to in order to enjoy it. Like cut your fellow hobo companion's head off I guess. I don't know, I've pretty much been upper-middle class all my life.

If you haven't seen any of the Chipmunks movies then you're doing yourself a disservice. They're actually a lot of fun. So much fun that this guy in Chicago was so excited while watching the most recent flick that he dropped trow in the theater and showed the audience his nuts. Ya know, because chipmunks loves nuts. It's a pun you jerks.

Horror Headlines: Monday October 31st, 2011

Ti West sounds like a rapper's name and for that reason I hate him. Now that we've gotten that out of the way here's the latest trailer for the directors new movie "The Innkeepers". The story revolves around two innkeepers who are determined to prove their inn is haunted before it closes its doors after being open for 100 years. It wouldn't hurt to toss in some bling and girls in booty shorts Ti. I'm just saying.

Norway is so hot right now. Not literally, I bet it's cold as hell over there right now. If you need proof just check out the trailer for "Dunderland" a new flick from the great fjords that follows a group of actors as they uncover the witchy secrets of an old abandoned Boy Scout camp. And by "Boy Scout" I assume they mean trolls because we all know Norway is 75% troll and 35% black metal fans. That's just simple math.

George R. R. Martin, author of "Games of Thrones", has made it ok for grown men to run around dressed up like they work at Medieval Times and not be mocked. For that I am pretty disappointed in him. But I love the show and in turn I am now excited to see that his book series "Wild Cards", which shows the effects of a alien virus outbreak in NYC, will be coming to the big screen.

If you're excited for the next installment of "The Chronicles of Riddick" series then you might be in trouble. Production on the film has been shut down in Montreal because One Race Films, which is owned by star Vin Diesel, have failed to pay for the studio where the film is being shot. If I was Vin I could blow something up then look at the camera and say "Check's in the mail" in a real bad ass voice. What am I saying, Vin Diesel only has one voice, bad ass.

In Real People News: 

I think it's great when you take pride in your job. Yes, these two Dominos employees broke the law when they went over to Papa John's and torched the place but still, you got to admire their dedication to making hot fresh delicious pizza and destroying all who appose them. You got to.

Sometimes you have to take drastic actions when your old lady denies you money to go out drinking with the fellas. I'm not sure dousing her with gasoline and lighting her pillow on fire is the rout you should really go, but I have an ATM card and I've never run into the problem so I can't really say.

Horror Headlines: Wednesday September 21st, 2011

If there's one thing people say to me after they get over the shock of meeting a real life podcast superstar it's that they wish "Underworld: Awakening" would be released in IMAX 3D. Well folks your dreams have been answered. No I don't mean the one you keep having of me where I'm floating above your bed in a school girl outfit I mean the IMAX thing. Because if you're not going to see Kate Beckinsale on a 700 foot screen you shouldn't see her at all. My measurements may be a bit off. Just FYI.

I'm not going to lie, the first trailer for "Paranormal Activity 3" made me go peepee in my pants a little bit. Just a little bit! And now here's a new poster for the flick. It didn't make me wet myself but it did give me a strange pressing sensation on my bladder. It then made me have a sharp stabbing pain that was immediately followed by a extreme burning. I think I may need to go see a doctor.

I love behind the scenes photos from movies sets. I love to see actors doing the same things I do. Things like drinking coffee, eating a sandwich or watching people make number 2 through a hole they drilled in the bathroom wall. And here's some cool pics of Kevin bacon, Jeff Bridges and Ryan Reynolds on the set of "R.I.P.D.", a new flick about two living dead cops on the hunt for a killer. Sorry, they aren't doing any of those things I said. I probably shouldn't have given you that impression.

Ti West, who I think is kind of a jerk for making "The House of the Devil" and for having that name and not being Asian, looks to finally be getting a release for his flick "The Innkeepers" thanks to the folks at Magnolia Pictures. The film, which focuses on a pair of investigators trying to prove a hotel is haunted as it's being shut down, will be released on VOD on December 30th before a theatrical release is given in February.

In Real People News: 

I remember the terror as a child when I realized it was show and tell day and I had nothing. Apparently the same terror ran through this Texas kid's head because he decided to grab his mom's crack pipe and drugs and bring them in to school. Next week he can bring in her mug shot. Way to plan ahead.

And here's a frightening story about a gang of drag queens that are terrorizing a Florida town and looting local shops for supplies to complete their drag-drobes. That's a new term I just made up for drag wardrobes. You're welcome RuPaul.

What Spooks the Masters of Horror?

I recently came across an article published by Jason Zinoman of the NY Times discussing what makes horror fans and horror directors tick. With the increasing number of horror films that have been packed into the theater this summer, especially this month, its clear that horror movies have been in the mainstream eye a bit more so than usual. However, to many of us seasoned horror fans, we've seen so many throat slashing, stabbing and torture scenes that it takes a lot to truly scare us. With all that horror directors have seen and done with their own films, they are no different.

Netflix Streaming Friday - "House of the Devil"

Horror films were just better in the '70s and '80s. Fact. Debate that all you want, but deep down inside, you know I'm right. While films like "Let the Right One In" still come along every now and then and remind us that the genre still has some life in it, even the best of these films are just lacking that charm, that mood, that vibe that those older horror flicks had. Even the worst, cheesiest schlock fests from this period had some heart and a feel that made them memorable, regardless of how awful the film itself was.

Snapshot: "The Innkeepers" (2011)

In what looks to be another slow burn type of horror flick from writer and director Ti West, "The Innkeepers" has been creating quite the buzz around the festival circuit. In the above snapshot, Pat Healy and Sara Paxton play Luke and Claire, the two final employees who have been scheduled to work during a supposedly haunted hotel's final week of business. The hotel in the movie is actually based on and filmed at a hotel that West and his crew stayed at during the "House of The Devil" filming, where they experienced strange happenings.

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