the rob zombie hype machine

"H2" Footage on ET

Clearly I've been hating on Rob Zombie's "H2" pretty much since the second it was announced. That's no secret. I'm giving it a rest for at least a day though, because this footage that aired on Entertainment Tonight late last week is actually really sweet. I waited a few days so I could find a version that wasn't recorded with a camera pointed at someone's television. That's so 2001, guys. Come on!

First Pic of Myers in "H2"

Rob Zombie's temporarily titled "H2" just wrapped filming, and they've released the first official still of Michael Myers with his mask on. As we reported a few days back, word is that Myers will remain maskless for up to 70% of the film, with Tyler Main's homeless man-beard filling in. When he is masked, here's what he'll look like, apparently covered in blood from the gunshot he received from Laurie Strode at the end of "Halloween". "H2" lands in theaters Labor Day weekend.

Horror Headlines: Friday April 10th, 2009

"The Cell 2" hits DVD and Blu-Ray June 16th, and the artwork's at the link. You know, in case you thought there were unanswered questions from the original.

There's a new "Uncle Coffins" commercial up at the "H2" Myspace, and still nothing from Danielle Harris. The wait continues...

Hot chick Erica Leerhsen is in "The Message", which has a trailer at the link. Leerhsen's prevous credits include "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" (2003) and "Blair Witch 2: Book of Shadows".

I'm not really sure that I'm anticipating Park Chan Wook's "Thirst" as much as everyone else is, but Twitch calls this trailer "brilliant", so I guess I'm just going to roll with it. Check it at the link.

Liam Neeson and Ralph Feinnes will star in the "Clash of the Titans" remake currently in development over at Warner Bro's. That may be more fancy Britishness than one set is capable of handling.

In Real People News: 

What would you do if you encountered a rare 1,1000 lb shark that has only been seen in the wild 41 times in history? Study it? Try to learn more? Apparently if you're in the Philippines, the answer is "eat it".

Ohio caller to a pop-radio station confesses to murder of bully in 1988. Sure seems like an unorthodox way to try and win concert tickets, but at least he gave it the old college try.

Guy busted for making Crack in a microwave? You tell ME where this happened.

The Sun claims this British guy found the visage of "Ghostface" in his bar of soap. Two things. 1: That doesn't look like Ghostface but it is kind of odd... 2: That soapdish makes me want to vomit.

On this day in history: 

1947: Agents of the FBI pay a visit to Screen Actors Guild president Ronald Reagan and his wife, actress Jane Wyman. They accuse the couple of belonging to Communist front groups. Reagan quickly agrees to become a secret informer.

Horror Headlines: Wednesday April 8th, 2009

Michael Myers spends nearly 70% of the new "Halloween" film without his mask on? Wonderful, just when you thought Zombie had run out of ways to rape your favorite childhood horror franchise. That guy's pretty inventive, isn't he?

According to the "H2" Myspace we should be seeing a trailer for the film soon, and other sites are reporting that the teaser will be attached to "Crank 2". Which would be great, because I can only report on so many behind the scenes videos or unrelated promos. I have to take a shower after each one to wash the feeling of being Rob Zombie's whore off... and that takes up a lot of time that I just don't have these days.

The Weinstein's have lost the rights to "Sin City 2". The newly freed up film is expected to be financed by a "private equity group", with some type of announcement coming soon. What we do know is that Robert Rodriguez's production company will still be producing, and they'll probably cast another stripper who won't take her clothes off. Joy.

Apparently I had forgotten the announcement that "Train" actually wasn't a remake of "Terror Train", and that an actual remake of that Jamie Lee Curtis classic slasher was in the works. Well, that did actually happen, and word comes now that cameras are about to roll fairly soon on the real "Terror Train" remake, this one NOT starring Thora Birch. Got all that? Good, because it was really important.

In Real People News: 

69 year old woman survives crashing into three cars and then a house, then the ambulance gets in an accident on the way to the hospital. Haven't you ever seen "Final Destination", lady? You should let Death win... he'll get you eventually. Just ask Devon Sawa.

A man reading a book and laughing in the woods in Germany prompted a search party because a woman thought someone was being tortured. When they eventually found him they decided to arrest him anyway, just for being creepy as hell. Who reads in the woods by themselves?

Could Zimbabwean President Robert Mugabe be in possession of the Ark of the Covenant? I don't know, but let's dig up Harrison Ford's corpse so he can go find out for us. Oh, he's not dead? Whoops.

On this day in history: 

1994: Kurt Cobain's body is found 3 days after committing suicide with a shotgun.

Horror Headlines: Tuesday March 7th, 2009

The poster for Richard Kelly's "The Box" (link fixed) features a big, terrifying picture of... Cameron Diaz's face. Yikes.

The remake of "The Creature from the Black Lagoon" is on hold while they see how "The Wolfman" remake does. The creature design is already done, and at this point they're just waiting for the go-ahead from the studio.

Radha Mitchell seems genuinely upset in this interview that although a sequel to "Silent Hill 2" is in development, the original director probably won't return. Which leads me to believe she never actually saw the original film, which was a steaming pile of the highest order.

If you're interested, there's two new "H2" videos floating around this morning. You know, in case you really wanted to hear an interview with a 19 year old girl about a sequel to a remake to a film that she had probably never seen or heard of before signing on to star in it. Who wouldn't want to do that?

Fangoria is holding a massive movie prop auction that you can actually watch and participate in online. Fancy that!

In Real People News: 

That truck driver who just cut you off on the highway? You might not want to fuck with him, because the FBI thinks there's a good chance he might be a serial killer. Not sure why it took them this long to come to that conclusion, but at least it's confirmed my irrational fear of truck drivers.

Remember when you saw that gang of roving kids in "Hostel" films and thought, "bullshit"? Ya, maybe Eli Roth is smarter than we thought.

Boy found dead in industrial sized oven, burnt to a crisp. Police could not confirm or deny reports that they were looking for a 6-inch tall Gingerbread man who sounds like Gary Busey.

There aren't adequate words to describe the sheer stupidity of the "Twilight" religion, so I'm not even going to try.

On this day in history: 

1970: The X-rated movie Midnight Cowboy wins the Oscar for Best Picture.

It's the Great Pumpkin, Michael Myers

This poster is being passed off as the "Official One-Sheet" for Rob Zombie's "H2", but word from STYD is that this is just one of dozens of contenders for the final poster. This is apparently the way studios normally work, commissioning a design company to come up with lots of options.

Uncle Coffins' Creature Double-Feature

No matter what you think about the upcoming “H2: Halloween 2” film, you gotta love Bill Moseley. I’ve been a fan every since he played Chop Top in “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2”. Well Mr. Moseley was to play "Uncle Seymour Coffins" in the second installment Rob Zombies “Halloween” reboot, but unfortunately a few weeks back was replaced by the dude you see above. He's Haddonfield’s very own Creature Double Feature host who brings the best in horror to the masses every Friday night at 10:30 on channel 18.

Horror Headlines: Tuesday March 31st, 2009

It took me a while, but I'm officially back from the dead (and the Philadelphia airport), and I'm here to bring you today's horror news!

Here's an image of Michael Myers walking through Haddonfield. It's sort of mysterioso I guess, but Zombie is seriously testing my ability to post stuff about his "Halloween" sequel every single day. Will it let up after they're done shooting in Georgia? Let's hope so, because I'm about ready to go cold turkey on "H2" news.

MTV claims that the comic book XXXombies is coming to the big screen. What is XXXombies about you might ask? Why, zombies fighting porn stars, what else?

Bill Hader will star in Judd Apatow's slasher flick "House of Joel". Somehow I love all three of those things, but when you put them together in once sentence it makes me supremely uncomfortable. Go figure.

First images from the second season of "True Blood" on HBO. Even though every one of our commenters tells me it sucked and they stopped watching, it appears that there are still some people out there interested in this show. I just can't seem to find them.

In Real People News: 

Not sure if I really care about seeing video of the Vice President's daughter snorting cocaine. I'm kind of intrigued by the description of her stumbling around and complaining that the line wasn't long enough though. That girl's a trooper!

The parents of a dead girl recently received a letter from her high school demanding she improve her attendance record. "Alright", her parents said, "but it's not going to be pleasant for anybody."

I would imagine a police officers' convention is not quite as fun as a horror con... additionally, it's probably a lot harder to rob, but that didn't stop someone from trying recently.

On this day in history: 

1996: During a homebrew exorcism in Rhode Island, a man accidentally punctures the esophagus of his mother-in-law when he jams two pointy steel crucifixes down her throat, causing a large quantity of blood to gush out. Mario Garcia is later charged with assault with a dangerous weapon.

Horror Headlines: Monday March 30th, 2009

Horrorhound Weekend has come to a close and now it's time for recovery! In light of some frustrating flights home, I've stepped up from the review desk to allow Eric the time to rest after a delayed flight as well as give him some extra time to go choke a customer service specialist! Stay tuned this week for the Horrorhound Recap from Mark, as well as a Podcast episode recorded live from the convention floor!

Paramount and Myspace join forces for a new web-series called "Section 8". Borrowing a concept from the old "10 Little Indians" song, the series claims to be a supernatural thriller as we watch a different character knocked off each week and attempt to discover who the killer is. How long until the internet meme concept explodes as Facebook groups form for fans of a Myspace series?

Following in the footsteps of "Dead Space", Electronic Arts plans to release a "Dante's Inferno" animated film to accompany the games release. With the mild popularity of the "Dead Space" animated feature, could this be a new trend in the converging entertainment industry?

While Rogue Pictures continues to work on their "Hack/Slash" adaptation, indie newcomer Ratio Pictures borrows the concept in their announced flick, "Eve". They're not even trying to hide the fact with their feature starring a young girl that runs around hunting serial killers, there is sure to be some legal hullabaloo following this one before its scheduled 2010 start date.

The official site for "Sorority Row" has been launched by Summit Entertainment. As usual, there's not a lot to it that you haven't seen already, but we'll keep an eye out for future updates.

Rob Zombie plans to ditch the iconic "Halloween" score originally recorded by John Carpenter in 1978. There were elements of Carpenter's score used in the original remake back in 2007.

In Real People News: 

A Norfolk man drops dead after playing Wii Fit. The doctors have dubbed the occurrence as "Sudden Adult Death Syndrome". With my superior medical knowledge, I'd be more likely to diagnose this as "Fat Man Running in Place for 2 Hours Syndrome".

A man in Washington state pays a $200 traffic fine with a plastic baggie filled with coins, bills and urine. Witnesses say he was rather pissed off.

A UK study proves bald men don't get laid. I would like to take this moment to remind you the ladies out there that the story mentions "Bald Men", not "Balding Men". I'm not out of the game yet!

On this day in history: 

March 30th, 1968. Two Bowery children happen across the body of a homeless drug addict in the street. The body was Bobby Driscol, the voice of Walk Disney's "Peter Pan".

Horror Headlines: Friday March 27th, 2009

Just sitting in an airport here, waiting for my flight to Indianapolis for Horror Hound Weekend. For updates on all the debauchery, you can always follow us on Twitter. If of course you don't give a crap about how much fun we're having, your regularly scheduled programming will resume on Monday. And don't forget, Lionsgate's "The Haunting in Connecticut" gets released across the country today.

Eric Heisserer has been brought on to rewrite the script for the "Thing" prequel that's currently in production. If his name sounds familiar, it's because he was also hired recently to rewrite the script for the "A Nightmare on Elm St." remake. Guess this guy's carving himself out quite a little niche for himself. No specific word was given as to what was wrong with the first draft.

Weird Al Yankovic has a cameo in Rob Zombie's "H2". I would usually make a snarky joke here, but my mother taught me if you don't have anything nice to say, you shouldn't say anything at all. They call that growth, people.

Mark Millar of "Wanted" (the comic book) fame, has a project in the works called "American Jesus", about a modern day Jesus taking on Satan. Sounds pretty sweet to me. Rest assured that I'll have Pete (our very own comic book guy) do some more investigating.

Trailer for the Finnish horror film "Skeleton Crew". See, I told you yesterday that the next wave of horror was to be Scandinavian flavored. Maybe next time you'll believe me.

In Real People News: 

You know how sometimes in movies, someone will jump from a building and someone else will try and catch them? Ya, in real life the one who does the catching usually dies.

Remember that crazy psychic chick from the 90's, Miss Cleo? Apparently she lives pretty close to me, and is now a lesbian. Go figure.

Pirates seem to be coming back in a big way recently. Have you noticed that? It's definitely strange. Anyways, here's a story about how they killed a guy. No punchline... I just think pirates are weird.

On this day in history: 

30: Pontius Pilate condemns Jesus to death.

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