the ward

Horror Headlines: Monday August 8th, 2011

I'm willing to give my friend Rob Zombie as many chances as his crispy disgusting hair wants to toss out. That's just the kind of guy I am. So when he takes to the twitter and says his new film "The Lords of Salem" is looking "demented, perverted satanic", I'm intrigued. For those of you not familiar with the film it's a heartwarming tale about a group of witches who come back from the great beyond to bring death and destruction on modern day Salem. Sounds like they also get some action also. Good for them.

It's about time there was a Roller Derby slasher film isn't it? That is of course if there already hasn't been one and I just haven't seen it. Let's pretend "MurderDrome" is the first of its kind though. The film is about an up and coming roller star who gets caught in a love triangle that eventually evolves into a demon filled blood bath. Demon roller people? That's got to be a new idea. Was there a demon in that Drew Barrymore flick that came out a couple years ago? I never saw it.

For those of you who haven't had a chance to get John Carpenter's "The Ward" you'll be able to get your disgusting little syrup stained hands on the DVD and Blu-Ray on August 16th. And today we've got some cover art, which is the same as the movie poster, and specs, commentary with John Carpenter and star Jared Harris. So there you have it, the same image you've seen 100 times already and some commentary with an actor who's in the movie about 15 minutes. Operators are standing by.

While it's no big surprise it's still nice to see that Bruce Campbell will in fact be in Sam Raimi's upcoming new film "Oz: The Great and Powerful" which tells the story of how everyone's favorite Wizard came to be. That is of course unless you consider those weirdos from "Lord of the Rings" to be your favorite wizards. And if that is the case I'd ask you to kindly stop reading my news.

In Real People News: 

What's worse than throwing a cat out of a seven story window? Raping it beforehand. But I guess when you're high on meth you do those sort of things. Or when you're from Iowa. I don't know the difference really.

Apparently there's a big problem in the Ukraine with restaurants keeping bears and forcing them to drink booze for other people's amusement. This is the first time I've ever wanted to go to the Ukraine.

Episode 168 - "The Ward"

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John Carpenter's latest, plus a lively debate on the Netflix price hikes.

Purchase this Back Episode $0.99

Horror Headlines: Monday May 23rd, 2011

A new poster for John Carpenter's new flick "The Ward" has come out and don't even bother clicking the link because I'm going to explain it so well you won't even need to see it. Remember that scene in "Labyrinth" Jennifer Connelly falls down the hole and all the hands hold her up? Well it's just like that but with Amber Heard in a short skirt. See! No need to look at it now.

You know what "The Ring" was missing? An all female Japanese pop group! I know it's so obvious now that I've said it. Luckily the movie "White" is here to fix that with a gaggle of new photos and a full out trailer. The movie revolves around the pop group Pink Dolls (I think that's a pun) and the strange events that happen to them after they discover a mysterious video. Sounds super spooky and as a bonus, dance numbers!

Confused as to why there's a "Carrie" remake in the works? Well so is Stephen King. In a recent interview with Entertainment Weekly he asked the bold question "why, when the original was so good?". The remake is set to stay truer to King's original book but by his own admission the movie version was actually scarier. He then went on to ask "what's the deal with airplane food?" but by then I assume the interviewer had walked out.

While we all wait for a new "Child's Play" movie to happen the good people at TikGames have decided to bring Chucky to your console in the form of a new video game they hope to have out this fall. The game will apparently be the original story and allow players to control the little killer himself. Will it be awful? Probably. Will I pay money for it? You bet your sweet ass I will.

In Real People News: 

Police in Ohio are on the look out for a bank robber sporting a mullet who is apparently responsible for at least two robberies and countless broken hearts. Serious hold up in the front, party in the back. Of course I'm 99% sure that 3 out of 4 men in Ohio have mullets so narrowing this down might not be so easy after all.

Well the rapture came and went without so much as a Billy Crystal public stoning but tossing the words "zombie apocalypse" in a headline about hurricane season drove so much traffic to the CDC's website that it actually crashed. Unless the CDC's website crashing was the rapture. I thought there was suppose to be fire shooting out of the sky but a server reboot can be pretty awful too.

Horror Headlines: Monday January 3rd, 2011

Quite possibly the only horror film to be funded via new money lending entity Kickstarter, "Absentia" has reached its full funding and has released a new poster and official trailer. Just remember; if it sucks? You all helped pay for it!

While there is still no announcement for a US release, you can catch a sneak peak trailer of John Carpenter's "The Ward" which releases January 21st in the UK.

Here's some sad news for you all; veteran character actor Pete Postlethwaite has passed away. Known for many small parts, he's an actor I can guarantee you'll recognize by his face if not by name.

Here's some news you've all been waiting for. "Casper The Friendly Ghost" is coming back from the dead as an all new 3D franchise. Anybody got the number for the Ghostbusters?

In Real People News: 

A 23 year old Oklahoma man shoots his 50 year old cougar wife in the head during sex. To his defense, his pressing a gun to her head during sex was a regular act for the couple, he just forgot to make sure the chamber was empty this time around. Whoops.

On this day in history: 

1961 - Three technicians -- John Byrnes, Richard McKinley, and Richard Legg -- are killed when the SL-1 experimental nuclear reactor explodes in Idaho Falls, Idaho. McKinley's corpse is found stuck to the containment dome ceiling, impaled on a control rod. The crewmen's radioactive bodies are so hot they have to be buried in lead-lined caskets.

Horror Headlines: Wednesday July 28th, 2010

If you've been dying to find out more about John Carpenter's next flick, you're in luck! The doors are now open to the official website for "The Ward".

Paramount is wanting to jump in on the encroaching alien bandwagon coming for 2011 as Michael Bay's Platinum Dunes snatches up the rights to an untitled alien thriller from Bobby Glickert. Little is known about the project at this time other than they claim it is a cross between "Cloverfield" and "Paranormal Activity".

Darren Aronofsky's proposed "Robocop" remake appears to be the first project to be thrown out as MGM prepares for impending doom with their $3.7 billion debt.

In an odd twist, moody singer Nick Cave has been brought in to pen a remake of "The Crow". At least cave has a firm grasp on that whole 'dark and brooding' atmosphere that "The Crow" loves so much.

In Real People News: 

U.S. troops are happy to share their knowledge and training with their counterparts on the Afghani Police Force, except for the issues with the Afghani Policemen getting stoned while out on patrol.

A University of Minnesota Dr. has cured a woman's intestinal bacteria and diarrhea problems by transplanting her husbands feces into her colon. The term 'fudge packing' has officially been retitled 'fecal transplantation'.

On this day in history: 

1945 - A US Army B-25 bomber crashes into the Empire State Building between the 78th and 79th floors. An engine plunges down an elevator shaft, sparking a fire in the basement. Eleven people in the building are killed, in addition to the three man bomber crew.

Horror Headlines: Monday January 11th, 2009

IFC has picked up the North American distribution rights to Tom Six's twisted horror/thriller "The Human Centipede (First Sequence)." Is it weird that I really want to see this one? Probably.

Fans of the After Dark Horrorfest will be pleased to hear that Chris Moore's upcoming horror/thriller "Kill Theory" is the latest film to be added to the lineup. Call me crazy, but this year's selection seems a little stronger.

Legendary filmmaker and horror icon John Carpenter sits down to discuss his latest genre offering "The Ward." The interview is lengthy, so make sure you've got plenty of time on your hands.

In Real People News: 

A Melbourne, Australia warehouse employee was crushed after a 200-kilogram pallet filled with computer equipment fell on him. CTRL-ALT-DEL failed to reboot his system.

A recent scientific study revealed that watching TV can increase your risk of heart disease by 18-percent Guess what? I'm screwed.

Horror Headlines: Wednesday October 4th, 2009

"Glee" fans rejoice; show star Cory Monteith has joined the cast of Jamie Babbit's "Breaking the Girl", a story of manipulative college girls suckering others into killing for them.

John Carpenter is working on his latest film "The Ward", and is now releasing pre-production diaries on his official site.

Kevin Williamson talks "Scream" reboots. As of now, the only real word is "It's going great!", with a few minor details.

In the 'do they really think people will buy that' department, details have been released for the Blu-ray edition of Roland Emmerich's "Godzilla" remake.

In Real People News: 

Boston Policemen were called in to investigate a suspicious find; a spilled chest of organs lying in a parking garage.

A 10 Ton Japanese fishing trawler was sunk off of Eastern Japan by a 200kg giant Jellyfish. Be sure to click through to fuel your sea creature infested nightmares!

On this day in history: 

1864 – American Civil War: Sherman's March to the Sea – Union General William Tecumseh Sherman begins burning Atlanta, Georgia to the ground in preparation for his march south.

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