Ryan Gosling

Don't even ask if anyone will forgive...

Rob Zombie has gone on record that he's done with horror movies for the time being. It's on the internet, it's true. But hey that doesn't mean that he can't go around making spooky houses for us all to enjoy during Halloween time. The Great American Nightmare will take place during the month of October in LA and feature a state of the art haunted attraction along with different bands playing during the month. Want to really frighten folks? Tell em you're going to make them watch "The Devil Rejects" directors cut all night. Get it? Cause that movie is awful.

John Hurt has just been added to the cast of FX's adaptation of Guillermo del Toro and Chuck Hogan's vampires taking over the world novel "The Strain". Hurt will play a pawn shop owner who has been hunting vampires since World War II. Sounds like he's really going to put a... HURT on those vampires huh? Man I'm good.

Oh right, Ryan Gosling is directing a travel to the underworld type flick called "How To Catch a Monster" because he thinks all the ladies out there give a crap about his art and don't just want to catch him strut around with his god damn perfect smile. Or maybe he already knows and doesn't care. In any case he's cast Iain DeCaestecker in the lead role of the project. Iain joins an already large cast that includes both Christina Hendricks and Eva Mendes. Two woman I pray never make the mistake that I care about their art.

Want to pay 50 bucks and see "World War Z" on June 19th, a few days before the film gets a wide release? No me either, and I thought the general consensus is no one wants to see the movie for any price, but I guess that doesn't matter to Regal Entertainment and the folks over at Paramount because they're offering folks a chance to do just that in selected cities. I don't know who the hell would possibly do that but if you're thinking about it please shoot me an email first because I'll read you the book over the phone for only 40 bucks.

Red Sea Media has made the smart move of picking up the distribution right to "Squirrels", a new film about a small town being terrorized by the fuzzy little nut munchers. Produced by the same folks that brought you "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter" there's no word on a cast yet but I think if Tiffany is free she's a sure fire lock to play the leading lady. Keep your fingers crossed.

Mother of god. Warner Bros has picked up the rights to Ryan Gosling's directorial debut titled "How To Catch a Monster". Need more? Christina Hendricks has signed on as the leading lady for the film about a mother whose son discovers a secret road leading to the underworld. I swear to god my keyboard just burst into flames from all this sex.

Salma Hayek is confirmed to be starring in "Everly", a new film from the one and only Joe Lynch. The film is about a woman who must fight her way through a horde of assassins sent by her mob boss ex. What's the interesting point here is that the entire film will be shot in one room which now that I think of it makes me think this entire thing was just one big creepy way for Joe Lynch to be able to lock himself in a room with Selma Hayek for a month.

Joe Dante is teaming up with Simon Pegg for a big screen adaptation of "Casting the Runes" by M.R. James. The story follows a blogger who's investigating the suicide of a celebrity and the self help guru connected to the death. The story was originally written close to 100 years ago which is amazing because they didn't even have the internet back then so how the hell would anyone know what a blogger is? This James guy must have had ESPN or some crap.

The two fanciest BGH podcast members strike out on their own for a spinoff show. Don't forget your monocle!

It looks like none other than Ryan Gosling has been signed up to star in the long discussed "Logan's Run" remake. Which is exciting because never in my life did I think I would hear my wife utter the words "Honey, I really want to see Logan's Run".

If you're going to buy one toy this year that doesn't require a black bag when walking out of the store then make it the new "The Walking Dead" toys coming from the good people at McFarlane Toys. Two series will be released from the comic book/TV show and the first set will hit shelves this September.

The second clip for "The Bleeding", which stars Kat Von D, DMX and 37 other people you don't think should be acting has hit the net and it is chock full of everything except bleeding. Well alright it's missing a lot of things but really there's not way to have EVERYTHING in one clip is there? Whales, a clown and the Sears Tower... physically impossible to have in the same shot. Think about it.

It looks like Simon West will direct the upcoming remake of "Red Sonja" and right now Amber Heard is the front runner to star. You'll remember West as the director of "Con-Air" and you'll see Heard getting deflowered by Nic Cage in "Drive Angry". I'm not saying if this is a good or bad thing.

Hayden Panettiere, Nikki Reed and Rebecca De Mornay are confirmed for the upcoming High School thriller "Downers Grove". I was going to make a joke about how it's ridiculous that Panettiere is playing a High School student but apparently she is only 21 so that's actually pretty young in movie school years.

What's up next for Oren "Mr. Paranormal Activity" Peli? Why a film called "Eliza Graves" that is loosely based on an Edgar Allan Poe short story. Hell yeah this is going to be awesome. The entire thing is going to be shot on helmet cams. Next level!

Speaking of! Apparently "Paranormal Activity 2" has up to 20 alternative endings to the film that will most likely make their way to the DVD and Blu-Ray releases. A couple of my favorites include the entire family hopping on the pool cleaner and riding off to safety and one where the female cast members all go out for a 3 hour pole dancing class and never bother returning to the house.

Well hello dreamy pants! Ryan Gosling is rumored to be taking the lead in the upcoming big screen adaptation of "All You Need Is Kill". I have no desire to see this but there's a 99% chance I will because my wife has made it no secret that she'd leave me in a heartbeat for this guy. To be honest I don't blame her, his eyes are like two pools you want to swim in for days.