guillermo del toro

Horror Headlines: Thursday September 5th, 2013

Submitted by Joe on Thursday, Sep 5th 2013

Natalie Brown, who I'm sure you all remember from "How to Lose a Guy In 10 Days", is the latest name to be added to the upcoming FX series "The Strain". For those of you who don't read my news every other week when I post it, "The Strain" is based on the Guillermo del Toro and Chuck Hogan's novels about a group of survivors trying to take back control after vampires have taken over the world. Want to know how it ends? I read it. The point here is I know how to read.

I like to watch "Mad Men" because I work in advertising and it's fun to see what people think I do even though the show is set 30 years ago and everyone is kind of miserable. I'm telling you this because Jared Harris, from the show, has now been cast in the lead role of the upcoming "Poltergeist" remake. I'm also telling you this because I haven't written the news in over a week and my clever segway skills are pretty rusty.

Did you know that SyFy was looking to move forward with a series based on the 1995 film "12 Monkeys"? Me either! Did you know that the film's director Terry Gilliam thinks this is a "very dumb idea"? Yeah I probably could've guessed that too.

I had completely forgotten about "Mad Max: Fury Road". I guess it wrapped filming back in December and now it looks like there's going to be three weeks of additional footage tacked on in November to complete the movie. No real word on what the additional filming is for but I'm willing to bet it's just to get some move vacation time down in Australia. Those freakin criminals sure know how to party.

In Real People News:

22 year old woman tries to run onto the field at an University of Iowa football game. Woman gets arrested after blowing a .341 BAC. Woman tweets about it with the tag #yolo. Woman becomes the first official Mrs. Bloody Good Horror.

Where do you hide 5 grand that you've stolen from your boyfriend? In your ass of course. How do you get said money out of your ass? Not with a toilet brush apparently. That gets you a one way ticket to the hospital.

Horror Headlines: Monday August 5th, 2013

Submitted by Joe on Monday, Aug 5th 2013

I had to stop at the grocery store this past thursday on my way home from work. As I walked through the front door I was immediately greeted by a middle aged man hunched over gagging while an employee of the store was standing behind him giving the Heimlich maneuver. The guy who was choking looked up, locked eyes with me and then after three good thrusts shot out a giant piece of peach onto the ground. The point of this story is if you steal fruit from the grocery store and eat it eventually the powers that be will punish you.

FX CEO John Landgraf has sent down word from the mountains that "The Strain", a new series based on Guillermo del Toro and Chuck Hogan's vampire trilogy, will be no more than 5 seasons. The show will follow a small group of rebels trying to take down a vampire empire that has taken over the world. The reason for the 5 season limit is that the shows creators are already putting it out there that the show will end with the same finale as the books, which is good news. This combined with the solid nights sleep I got last night is really starting off the week on a good foot.

Remember Alexandra Breckenridge in the first season of "American Horror Story"? Yeah, she was the slutty maid. I know! She was my favorite too. Well good news folks, she'll be returning to the show for it's third season which is being titled "American Horror Story: Coven". No word yet on what role she'll be playing but the season is suppose to be set around a group of spooky witches... I think. Really I'm just hoping for slutty witches.

I've never seen "Akira", I don't know what it's about and Japanimation in general confuses and frightens me. Apparently a live action version of the film(?) has been kicking around for a while and now "Orphan" director Jaume Collet-Serra has been attached to the project and it's officially moving forward. I bet those whack jobs dressed up like giant robots I saw walking outside the Rosemont convention center on my way to Toby Keith's I Love This Bar and Grill are all excited about this. Or angry. I don't really understand any of this.

"House of Flying Daggers" director Zhang Yimou has officially been confirmed to be taking on the "Hunchback of Notre Dame" remake, which has also officially been confirmed I guess. Josh Brolin is set to start in the film, which is the retelling of the classic tale of Quasimodo and the main reason I grew to love Gypsies as a child. Well this story and Cher. Mostly Cher.

In Real People News:

When a sex offender moves into your neighborhood you're immediately worried about the kids. The dogs on the other hand, I never would have thought to worry about the dogs. Of course this is Florida, and looking outside to see your neighbor and your dog going at it is probably not that uncommon.

A 12 year old boy robbing a lemonade stand with a BB gun sounds just down right adorable doesn't it? Wait no, terrible. It's terrible. He's being charged with armed robbery, which is terrible. Oh man, did he have a little tiny ski mask on? Don't tell me, don't tell me. I don't want to know.

Episode 257 - "Pacific Rim"

Submitted by Eric on Thursday, Jul 25th 2013

This week we go big... REAL BIG.

Purchase this Back Episode $0.99

Pacific Rim (REVIEW)

Submitted by mark on Monday, Jul 15th 2013

Historically, the onset of the summer movie season means lean times for horror fans. While there is plenty of enjoyment to be dragged out of the big budget comic and light sci-fi films that pepper the summer blockbuster landscape, there’s a general lack of quality films for genre fans to sink their teeth into. Guillermo Del Toro has thrown us excitable devotees a bone this summer in the form of “Pacific Rim,” a Kaiju-tastic summer blockbuster that hits the spot not in spite of its cliches, but because of them.

Horror Headlines: Tuesday June 18th, 2013

Submitted by Joe on Tuesday, Jun 18th 2013

Rob Zombie has gone on record that he's done with horror movies for the time being. It's on the internet, it's true. But hey that doesn't mean that he can't go around making spooky houses for us all to enjoy during Halloween time. The Great American Nightmare will take place during the month of October in LA and feature a state of the art haunted attraction along with different bands playing during the month. Want to really frighten folks? Tell em you're going to make them watch "The Devil Rejects" directors cut all night. Get it? Cause that movie is awful.

John Hurt has just been added to the cast of FX's adaptation of Guillermo del Toro and Chuck Hogan's vampires taking over the world novel "The Strain". Hurt will play a pawn shop owner who has been hunting vampires since World War II. Sounds like he's really going to put a... HURT on those vampires huh? Man I'm good.

Oh right, Ryan Gosling is directing a travel to the underworld type flick called "How To Catch a Monster" because he thinks all the ladies out there give a crap about his art and don't just want to catch him strut around with his god damn perfect smile. Or maybe he already knows and doesn't care. In any case he's cast Iain DeCaestecker in the lead role of the project. Iain joins an already large cast that includes both Christina Hendricks and Eva Mendes. Two woman I pray never make the mistake that I care about their art.

Want to pay 50 bucks and see "World War Z" on June 19th, a few days before the film gets a wide release? No me either, and I thought the general consensus is no one wants to see the movie for any price, but I guess that doesn't matter to Regal Entertainment and the folks over at Paramount because they're offering folks a chance to do just that in selected cities. I don't know who the hell would possibly do that but if you're thinking about it please shoot me an email first because I'll read you the book over the phone for only 40 bucks.

In Real People News:

A Florida man stabbed his brother after an argument over some mac and cheese. Florida.

I think this kind of crap only happened in the 20's but a Florida woman is under arrested after she threw acid in the face of her boyfriend after she showed up to his house drunk and refused to leave. Didn't that do that in the 20's? Seems like something they'd do. "Gangster Squad" was a bad movie.

Horror Headlines: Friday April 26th, 2013

Submitted by Joe on Friday, Apr 26th 2013

Little lesson for your kids out there. If you ignore going to the dentist for multiple years it will eventually bite you in the ass and make at least 2 solid months of your life a never ending nightmare.

The idea has been kicking around for a while and now it looks like MTV will in fact be bringing "Scream" to the small screen. No confirmation on if Wes Craven will have anything to do with the project but it looks like a pilot is moving forward and if it's picked up the hour long series would hit the tube sometime next Summer. Live every day like it's your last my friends. Every god damn day.

It was only a matter of time before Guillermo del Toro and Chuck Hogan's vampire trilogy "The Strain" made its way from the pages up to the big screen and now it looks like Corey Stoll has landed the lead in the adaptation. Stoll will play a doctor who teams up with a small group to battle a vampire clan that has taken over the world. I've read these books. I'm smart.

August 8, 2014 will be the day that Universal Pictures finally drops "Dracula", a new film about a man who find himself turning into a wolf every time there's a full moon, into theaters. Wait no, that can't be right.

Want to go see Goblin perform the entire "Suspiria" soundtrack live in Austin Texas this summer? Me either! What if I were to tell you tickets were $175 bucks? I know I want to see them even less now too!

In Real People News:

A Michigan man has been arrested for having sex with dogs. I know in Michigan right? Crap like this never happens there.

A Florida man was recently arrested while being under the influence of LSD and asked the police to cut his penis off. I know in Florida right? Crap like this never happens there.

Horror Headlines: Tuesday February 5th, 2013

Submitted by Joe on Tuesday, Feb 5th 2013

If you're in the market for a new home and happen to have $2.1 million sitting around then why not move into the house from the original "Nightmare on Elm Street" film? I know what you're thinking though, West Hollywood, right? Who wants to live in California? Everyone is so damn annoying there, right? And all that traffic? Plus it's full of people from California. Well it does have a guest house also so maybe that outweighs all that other stuff.

If you don't like Colin Farrell then you're a jerk. There I said it. He's so damn charming I just don't get why anyone would dislike him. I bring him up because he's joined Anthony Hopkins in the cast of "Solace", a new flick about an FBI agent who reaches out to a retired psychic to help him track down a murderer. I could understand why you might not like Hopkins though. He comes off as kind of snooty.

Jocelin Donahue, who you might remember disliking after seeing "House of the Devil" has signed on to the cast of "Insidious: Chapter 2". She'll play a young Lorraine Lambert in the film, who I don't particularly remember from the original film but I'm going to go out on a limb and say she was a relative or something of the main characters and spooky stuff happened to her.

Blah blah blah Guillermo del Toro is doing another movie. It's going to be a new version of "The Secret Garden". It's about a garden that's secret and then all kinds of crazy del Toro stuff happens and we all go whoooo and then I ask where the hell the new "Haunted Mansion" movie that he's been talking about for years is.

In Real People News:

Ya know with all the awful crap I've posted on here this woman in Georgia who attacked a man with a jar of olives doesn't really seem so bad. Good for her.

It's got to be sad when the only way you can get money is to break into the local Dollar Tree. It's got to be even sadder when you screw that up and lock yourself in and have to call 911 to get out.

Episode 236 - "Mama"

Submitted by Eric on Wednesday, Jan 23rd 2013

It takes 6 of us to review this movie, and we still can't come to a consensus...

Purchase this Back Episode $0.99

Horror Headlines: Monday January 20th, 2013

Submitted by Joe on Monday, Jan 21st 2013

I just spent three days in Wisconsin and between the beer, sausage and cheese I'm not sure how my heart is still functioning. I took a shower Sunday night and I swear my pores started to leak cheese sauce. It tasted delicious though so I'm not so upset.

I lost interest in the second season of "American Horror Story" pretty quickly but I'm still mildly interested in seeing season 3 because I liked the first a super lot. Of course the news that Ryan Murphy has dropped that the upcoming season will be a modern day romance story does not have me giddy at all. Then again Jessica Lange, Sarah Paulson and Evan Peters have already been confirmed to be returning so maybe there will be a 3 way love triangle there so that could be frightening. You're picturing it right now aren't you. It's a terrible image.

"Sons Of Anarchy" star Charlie Hunnam has landed his greasy little locks a role in Guillermo del Toro's new flick "Crimson Peak". Details of his role are still unknown but the film is said to be a modern take on the classic ghost story. What that actually means is beyond me but what if the ghosts were actually alive and like working at our local car dealerships or something? Did I just blow your mind? I think I did.

I may or may not have completely forgotten that NBC had a "Dracula" TV series in the works but if I'm being honest here it just dawned on me that I may have a 6 year old child somewhere in the greater Philadelphia area so I've got a lot worse things to worry about. Moving on! Jonathan Jessica De Gouw has been cast in the role of Mina Murray, a young medical student who also happens to be the reincarnation of the fanged one's true love. Now that I think about it maybe I should have kept that whole kid thing to myself.

At this point the only way the "Zombieland" sequel discussion could get more ridiculous is if a script gets written so Bill Murray can shred it. But now there's talks that a TV series based on the show, which had been discussed back in 2011, may actually be a go and a call for casting has gone out. Nothing has been confirmed of course and the project will die 4 or 5 more times before the year ends but at the very least it will give me something to write about and at the end of the day isn't that all we really want? I thought so.

In Real People News:

Two strippers in Wisconsin are in hot water after they got into a full on fist fight over a dollar bill. A single dollar. Not going to lie, this sounds like the greatest strip club ever to me.

A Florida man is under arrest after he bit his girlfriend's thumb off during an argument the couple was having. The only way I can see this not ending with him in prison is if the argument was about whether or not he could bite a human thumb off.

Mama (REVIEW)

Submitted by Andy on Monday, Jan 21st 2013

Mama marks the feature film debut of director Andrés Muschietti. Inspired by his short film of the same title , Mama revels in archaic horror tropes; favoring the terrors of primordial nature, feral humanity, madness, ghosts moaning in the night, and the return of the repressed. The film is drenched in fiercely aggressive shadows, tightly framed locations, and more than a handful of scenes involving scuttling figures climbing across floors and walls.