happy town

Horror Headlines: Wednesday December 8th, 2010

Submitted by Joe on Wednesday, Dec 8th 2010

I've made a decision to not bother watching the next season of "True Blood" and Neil Hopkins' dreamy eyes aren't going to change that. Him along with Christina Moore and Chris Butler have been added to next season's cast and they'll all play wizards or gargoyles or something stupid.

"Blood is Blood" looks like a monster flick set in the middle of the woods with half naked women. In other words it looks really really awesome and I'm all a flutter about it. A new trailer for the flick, which apparently use to be called "Lockjaw" has hit the tubes and shows all the things I've promised and more.

Put it in the books kids, two trailers in a row that I don't have anything awful to say about. And this one has John Leguizamo! "Vanishing on 7th Street" is about a small group of people who find each other after they wake up and discover most of the world has disappeared. Excited? Wow and you haven't even seen the trailer yet, I hope you don't have a heart attack.

"Echo Lake" is a new online web series about a small town a serial killer is running around killing everyone. This sounds like a handful of really bad TV shows that have been flops, see "Happy Town" and "Harper's Island", but hey maybe it'll work online. What do I know.

In Real People News:

A Wisconsin woman apparently bit off her 72 year old husband's tongue when he went to kiss her goodnight recently. Just to top things off she then proceeded to throw coffee at the police when they came to her house. Old people are freaks.

And to prove my point here's a report that says men over 75 years old want more sex but are unfortunately limited by opportunity and failing health. If I had my way they would also be limited by severe laws but it's becoming painfully clear that I'll never be president so enjoy all the horny old men wandering the streets America.

Horror Headlines: Monday June 25th, 2010

Submitted by Casey on Monday, Jun 21st 2010

All signs are pointing to doom for ABC's "Happy Town" as the show has been yanked from its summer time slot, with plans to air the final two episodes on "some Saturday in July". It's pretty bad when they won't even give you a date for your finale.

In case you happened to miss it over the weekend, Snoop Dogg wrote a love song to Sookie Stackhouse, the lead character of HBO's "True Blood". Yah, that happened.

According to Elvira's "B" log, we can expect the return of Elvira's Movie Macabre later this year! Though there is no word yet on when or what station, she does make mention that the show will be nationally syndicated.

Late last week British actress Imogen Poots was cast as the female lead in the fast tracked "Fright Night" remake. I just wanted to be able to use the word 'Poots' in a news story.

In Real People News:

An Australian millionaire swallowed rat poison to avoid going to jail after receiving a guilty verdict for sexually abusing his step-daughter since she was 11 years old. Thankfully, he was saved at a local hospital forcing him to face his sentencing for the crimes he committed.

When this Welshman went to trial for child pornography, they also found numerous accounts of extreme pornography on his computer as well. Said extreme pornography included videos of women having sex with numerous animals, including a dead squid.

On this day in history:

1942 - A Japanese submarine surfaces near the Columbia River in Oregon, and fires 17 shells at nearby Fort Stevens. Nobody is injured. It is one of a handful of attacks by the Japanese during World War II against the U.S. mainland.

Happy Town 1.1: "In This Home on Ice"

Submitted by Joe on Thursday, Apr 29th 2010

Haplin Minnesota, also known as Happy Town to the locals, might possibly be the greatest place on earth. The fishing’s good, there’s no crime and because of a giant bread factory it smells like fresh rolls all the time. Kind of gets you all warm and fuzzy huh? Alright so there was the whole yearly disappearance of one of the residents but honestly for all the good in the town I think giving up one person a year is a fair trade off. Now, five years after the last disappearance there’s been a murder in Happy Town and that’s where the first episode of the show starts out.

Check Out "Happy Town" Tonight on ABC

Submitted by Joe on Wednesday, Apr 28th 2010

There hasn't been much promotion for the new ABC show "Happy Town" which premiers tonight on the old boob tube. If it sucks though that might not be such a bad thing as it will most likely be canceled pretty quickly. Of course in all honesty if it's really good there's a solid chance it won't be around long either. In any case there's a 95% chance Eric is going to make one of us underlings watch it tonight so let's get to it.