dark places

Horror Headlines: Friday September 6th, 2013

Two days in a row. I'm taking the rest of the month off.

Ah right, there's a "Terminator" reboot in the works. It was really only a matter of time, but now that "Game Of Thrones" director Alan Taylor is being tossed around as a possible director I'm somewhat interested. And by interested I mean I assume I'll like the movie for 20 minutes and then be completely confused about what the hell is going on and who all these people are. When the hell is winter going to actually come!?

The big screen adaptation of "Dark Places" has added Drea de Matteo, of "Sopranos" fame, to its ever growing cast list. Based on the book by the same name, the film tells the story of a woman who's forced to revisit the events of her families murder when she was 7 and the brother who she testified against as the murderer. Charlize Theron and Christina Hendricks are also in the movie... Boobs.

All child actors are frightening, creepy and should be locked in cages like zoo animals. But i understand they are a necessity in some films. Like the "Poltergeist" remake, which has just cast Kyle Catlett of "The Following's", in one of its little people roles. They should have handlers like animals and be cleaned with hoses. Just saying.

Universal has picked up Lee Shipman and Brian McGreevy to pen the script to another remake of H.G. Wells' "The Island Of Dr. Moreau". Why the hell not huh?

In Real People News: 

Here's a heartwarming story about a Georgia based animal shelter that for 100$ promised to find new homes for dogs whose owners could no longer take care of them but instead just went ahead and killed them. Wait no, that's not heartwarming at all.

An Oregon woman is all bent out of shape after she found a mouse bone in her box of cereal. I'll be honest I always assume people in Oregon just chewed on bones and drank dip spit for breakfast.

Horror Headlines: Wednesday, May 16th, 2011

Does everyone hate Sacha Baron Cohen now? Is that the new thing? I'm on board I guess.

Isabelle Fuhrman will always be the creepy little girl from "Orphan" to me. Except when I read "Orphan" quickly and think it says Oprah. Then I just get really really confused. Especially when I read Oprah is going to be starring the "Suspiria" remake. So just to recap, Oprah is not starring in remake of Dario Argento's classic film "Suspiria". Isabelle Fuhrman who was in "Orphan" will be. And they're both creepy. but for different reasons.

The cast of the "Carrie" remake looks to be shaping up nicely with both Alex Russell and Ansel Elgort in talks to take on roles in the film. I have no idea who either of those guys are and I think one of them does Broadway crap so I'm kind of happy about that. Good talk huh?

"Contagion" writer Scott Z. Burns has been tapped to pen the script for the upcoming sequel to 2011's "Rise of the Planet of the Apes". Rupert Wyatt, who directed the first film will also take the director's chair this time around. Also, Andy Serkis, who jumped around in a suit to bring Caesar the ape to life will return and most likely spawn a bunch of ridiculous talk that a guy who rolls around on the ground in a leotard should get an Oscar.

Everyone's favorite little spark plug Amy Adams is in talks to play the lead in a new film called "Dark Places". Adams would be Libby Day, a woman who becoming involved with a secret society that's obsessed with the strange murder of her family some 25 years ago. Can she look adorable while visiting her convicted brother in prisons? All signs point to yes.

In Real People News: 

A group of Kentucky students are under arrest for posting upskirt videos of their teacher on the internet. I am now thinking back to every teacher I ever had and throwing up a little bit in my mouth. Except Mr. Cable. That guy had it going on.

A Utah student is in hot water after he mistakenly left his homework inside a house he robbed. So not only is he going to jail but now he also has to explain to his teacher why his homework is missing. This is probably a lot cooler than the dog ate it story though.

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