beauty and the beast

Horror Headlines: Tuesday, February 14th, 2012

"The Wicker Tree" might possibly be my number one favorite film based on "The Wicker Man" that isn't exactly a sequel or a remake. There was a lot of competition. Oh and I haven't seen it. But still, number 1. The good news here is that the film will finally see the light of day on DVD and Blu-Ray on April 24th. If that news doesn't put you in the mood then you're dead from the waste down.

Go ahead and add a new version of "Beauty And the Beast" to the long list of movies Guillermo del Toro is working on. Warner Bros. has confirmed that the great Spaniard will be directing their retelling of the classic tale. The film will be called "Beast" and I assume will not feature Angela Lansbury in any way, shape or form. She was the teapot in the Disney animated version. That's what that joke means.

If I was forced at gun point to pick a director for "Jitters", a new family friendly flick about mutated bugs, I would pick Mike Mitchell. Yes the guy who directed "Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked". Seems obvious when you say it out loud. Luckily for me Paramount picked him too. So you don't have to put a gun to my head. Unless that's how you get your kicks, fly-boy. I don't want to judge.

Blah blah blah Warner Bros. blah blah "Paranormal Activity" meets "Rear Window" blah blah title is "The Waiting". Plop plop fizz fizz.

In Real People News: 

Here's a fun story about a High School coach who accidental posted nude photos of himself on Facebook for the world to see. I can only imagine the mental issues I would of had if that had happened when I was a kid. Coach Ronca was a hairy, frightening SOB.

It's Valentine's Day so here's a story of love. A Minnesota man has been arrested after he was caught going to town on himself right outside his girlfriends jail cell window. Are you crying right now? It's ok, everyone loves romance.

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