a good marriage

Horror Headlines: Wednesday September 12th, 2012

I come to you this fine morning from the waiting lounge of Porter airlines in sunny Newark New Jersey. I'll be honest up until about a week ago I had no idea Porter airlines existed but now I'm hooked. Free coffee, food and wifi in the airport? I've been told the later flights have free booze. How is that possible? I plan on taking them every time I fly to Canada. Yes I never plan on going to Canada again after today but that doesn't make any of this less exciting.

Joan Allen seems like an all around nice gal. I can't say I remember one movie she's been in or actually recognize her face or name but still I think she's got a winning personality. And if that doesn't sell you on the fact that she's been added to the cast of the big screen adaptation of Stephan King's "A Good Marriage" I'm not sure what will. The story follows a wife who discovers her husband has been hiding an awful secret for many years. What's my awful secret you ask? I love those little country stores that sell all kinds of jams, jellies and knick knacks. There, it's finally out there.

If you love Michael Bay and James Wong, and I mean really love them like you want to be with them, then you're going to be super excited about the new supernatural cop drama the two are working on for A&E titled "Occult". The show follows two investigators who find themselves a part of a new task force that focuses on the occult. Just to be clear I don't mean you love them like brothers I mean you love them like you want to kidnap them and hold them hostage.

I don't know what it is about Neil Jordan but the guy has a name that makes me want to throw him off a cliff. I mean I like his movies and all I just can't stomach the name. Neil.... JORDAN. But I will get past it and watch "Byzantium", a new film of his that was just picked up by IFC. The film follows two girls who find themselves on the run when they encounter a 200 year old vampire. To be clear I'm going to watch the movie because apparently they work in a brothel for a while and the chance of nudity trumps all name hate.

Everyone's favorite uber-star Nic Cage is apparently in talks to take the lead in a new film titled "I Am Wrath". In the film Cage would play a husband who must take the law into his own hands when he finds the people investigating the murder of his wife are not such nice fellas. I assume they're fellas cause you know you never see a real prick female cop in movies. I don't know if that's sexist or not. I think it might be.

In Real People News: 

Ah young love. It makes you do crazy things. Taking off your boyfriend's prosthetic leg and beating him with it is not the first crazy thing that comes to mind usually but what do I know. I've never lived in Florida.

Biting off someone's nose during an argument is a pretty extreme form of lashing out but doing THAT to your sister? That's just bad family values.

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