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#TweetWithBGH Made It To "Hellraiser: Revelations" and Thank God It's All Over

It was like the final performance of a play nobody ever cared all that much about to begin with: like a giant, online cast party full of drinking, snark, and so many bitter regrets. If there’d ever been restraint in our tweeting there was certainly none to be seen tonight: we made it to Hellraiser: Revelations and we were all out of bubblegum. I’m not even going to bother to summarize the plot before we begin. Gary J Tunnicliffe and Victor Garcia, if you wanted me to pay better attention to your movie you should have made it not the 9th installment of the Hellraiser franchise. Here we goooooooooooo:

So, this movie begins as a found footage, because 2011.

After the two protagonists are killed in Tijuana, their parents (and an exposition spewing sister/girlfriend) decide to throw a dinner party. Hey, they would have wanted it that way!

Oh, and it must be said: this is the first (and to date only--only!) Hellraiser installment where Pinhead is NOT played by the original Doug Bradley. One guess as to how everyone felt about that:

(Sophie and Evan voted for Bradley. I was too busy imagining Meryl Streep’s award-winning turn in Pinhead v Pinhead) Punhead:

Sophie spots a vital continuity error...

...while Evan does some important sleuthing:

Meanwhile, the film, desperate for our attention, stooped to some incestuous lows to get us to stop paying attention toeach other on Twitter:

So many plotholes, so much bad acting, such terrible dialogue…

A dear friend stopped by to say hello

Bravely, we crossed the finish line together.

But….. are horror franchises ever really over?

Puppetmaster? Mortal Kombat? Wrong Turn? Scream? Let us know on Twitter, friends! Until the next #TweetWithBGH!

Spencer

Contributor

A loophole in his parents' "anti-scary movie, pro-literacy" policy meant that Spencer had read Stephen King's entire body of work by the time he was in middle school. He soon discovered the horror and B-movie offerings on late night cable TV and was hooked for life. He currently lives, works, and writes in North Carolina.

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