Horror Headlines: Thursday May 20th, 2010

Because they're not completely satisfied with their previous abomination, Who in their right mind thinks this is a good idea? So much for professional integrity.

In other pointless remake news, MTV has apparently ordered 12 episodes of their upcoming television series "Teen Wolf". As much as I hate to admit it, I'll probably give this one a chance. Don't you dare judge me. Actually, go ahead this time.

Since Hollywood's creativity is running a little short these days, it's not surprising that Robert Shaye's Unique Features is dangerously close to snagging the rights to the hit Playstation 3 thriller "Heavy Rain". Here's a thought: Why not just play the game? Seriously. What the hell is wrong with you people?

In Real People News: 

What should you do if you're a being mugged by three villainous individuals? Run, don't walk, to the handy ninja school down the street. Chances are they're ready and willing to lend a helping hand.

If, like me, you purchased one of those trendy Miley Cyrus bracelets from Wal-Mart earlier this week, you may want to toss them into the nearest dumpster. Unless, of course, you're just hankering for a little cadmium poisoning. I was through with being cool, anyway.

On this day in history: 

1999 - Several decomposing body parts are found rotting away inside a bank vault in Snowtown, Australia.

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