The plotholes of Hellraiser:Hellworld are like a roller coaster: staggering in their enormity, but also kinda fun. Yet again, we’re faced with someone else’s original script that got Pinhead scotch-taped into it (this is the fourth in a row, in case you’ve lost count). This sequel involves a group of teenaged friends who become obsessed with a Hellraiser themed video game (it takes place “outside” of the franchise, until it doesn’t). When one of their friends, Adam, becomes so involved with the game that he kills himself, their lives are torn apart….just kidding! Actually they all go to an awesome Hellraiser themed sex party thrown by--who knows!--because Adam would have wanted it that way, probably. After being shown around the mansion by their creepy host (Lance Henriksen), they hook up with strangers and are summarily killed. Fasten your seatbelts, gang.
And so it begins all. Hellraiser: Hellworld is the name of the movie and also our lives. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
Judging by the landlines and the old computers….I'm thinking this may have sat on a shelf for a little while. #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
Oh wow, I can see why they're so sucked into that video game! Oh wait, haha, jk guys, I'm drunk. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
If you invited me to a Hellworld themed party, I would definitely go #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
Well Adam sounds like an idiot if he would've loved a House of the Dead party. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
Ok, who the actual fuck are these kids and why are they so into this? #whereskirstywhenyouneedher #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
Did they take a group field trip to Kinkos to print those invitations? #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
So does everyone who comes to the house get an unexplained tour of everything by Lance Hendrickson or...? #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
@EvanSlead I know, why did he single these kids out? I've been confused from the beginning #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
Those Nokia phones!! They look like Game Boys. I wish he'd given them walkie talkie headsets #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
I may or may not have just fallen asleep during this. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
Just realized that a bunch of my tweets were autocorrecting to "#TweetWitBGH" Not helpful! #TweetWithBGH pic.twitter.com/KBnCALroiw
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
So far this movie has been ripping off Eyes Wide Shut, Saw, and maybe-arguably The Craft #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
At this point, couldn't he have just walked over to her? This phone thing seems dumb. #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
@philliesfemme and why are their names in the phones? #tweetwithbgh
— Ben Ecker (@BenEcker) October 5, 2015
So these masks make everyone look like they're ..... 80 years old. Fire that party planner #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
Are there rules as to when you wear the mask and when you don't? Why am I even asking. What I am doing. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
How is that mask not ruining this blow job for him? #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
This fellatio scene illustrates another reason as to why these masks are the biggest turn off ever created #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
So you're telling me only college aged attractive people play the online game based on the "fantastic" Hellraiser franchise? #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
Where are the creepy 40 year old men who poop in their pants at this party? Cause online Hellraiser game is that demographic. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
@EvanSlead "if you don't see the creep at the party it's because it's you" #tweetwithbgh
— Ben Ecker (@BenEcker) October 5, 2015
This movie is literally all montages with public sex scenes connecting them all. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
It takes a while, but eventually a few of the characters wander off alone to empty rooms in the house, and, as typically befalls characters who wander off alone in movies like this, they are brutally murdered. Soon one of the white guys, I forget exactly which one, goes down into the basement--full of fetuses in jars because where else would you keep them--and discovers the corpse of his friend.
#ThatAwkwardMoment when you find your friend's dead body and can't stop touching it #thatsnotlatex #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
"They even put the latex corpse in Derek's clothes!" This guy is so dumb he deserves to die #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
If someone attacked me in that basement I would be hurling them fetus jars like nobody's business #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
Literally just step to one side or the other. No one made you stand in front of the hook, doofus. #middleschoolinsults #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
Yes Lance, yes it is just like a bad horror movie. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
Yeah, no, this is so ripping off Buffy #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
This wannabe-meta dialogue is the scariest thing in this movie so far. SCARY BAD! #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
Ironically none of the actors in this went meta enough to realize how hellish the entire movie would be after they filmed it. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
If I called my boyfriend and he said "I thought I just killed you" I wd.....do a lot of things that weren't "keep talking" #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
The turn that blonde actress makes from being scared to miss toughie is so harsh that I threw up a little. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
Oh, I just know martial arts for no reason - CHELSEA IS EVERYTHING THAT IS WRONG WITH WOMEN IN MOVIES #theworst #getout #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
Somewhere out there a sex offender with his hand wrist deep in a bowl of jalapeño Cheetos is giving this movie a 10/10 online. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
hahah I def did not need to see him duct taping the pvc pipe and explaining how ventilation works #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
This movie keeps explaining things I never had questions to and retcons itself from scene to scene. Okay. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
"Confessions, orgasms, revelations" Hold on, rewind. What was that middle one? #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
Soooooooooo….were these guys just cumming all over their coffins? #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
Because shared hallucinations, everyone #thatshowthatworks #tweetwithbgh
— Ben Ecker (@BenEcker) October 5, 2015
Do they really need to open all the coffins and make body burritos right in front of her? These are the worst cops ever. #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
So how did they all see what everyone else was hallucinating? I thought the twist was dece until I realized it's ludicrous #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
Somehow I knew this movie would end with jizz filled coffins & the worst actress on the planet screaming at every extra on set #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO @ that phone call making ghost #TweetWithBGH
— S. G. Cherryhomes (@GreenSpe) October 5, 2015
Are they an item now? How long has it been since they woke up in coffins? Who's on the phone? WHAT IS HAPPENING??? #TweetWithBGH
— Sophie Day (@philliesfemme) October 5, 2015
This movie has more endings than Return of the King. #TweetWithBGH
— Evan Slead (@EvanSlead) October 5, 2015
Hey everyone! Can you believe we only have one Hellraiser movie left? Please join us next week at an unusual time--8:30 PM EST on Monday, October 12 -- for the final Hellraiser live tweet. There may be a drinking game.