10 Killer Critters
Animals. They come in all shapes and sizes, textures and dispositions. Some of them you can't help but to grab hold of, squeeze hard and whisper sweet nothings in their ear. Others, you can't help but to grab hold of them, squeeze hard, and never let up until their eyes pop out. They are mother nature's own cuddly playmates and deadly assassins; or sometimes a mixture of the two.
Throughout the years horror films have visited the territory of killer critters innumerable times. Some films met with amazing success such as "Jaws" and "Cujo", but others weren't quite so well known. Some, were simply just too big of a stretch of the imagination to find yourself fearing for your life in their presence. This week, I give you a list of 10 Killer Critters for you to feast your eyes upon.
You know what people? Grizzly bears? They're big and they get pissed off easily. It's best not to go tromping around in their backyard, especially with a group of loudmouthed degenerates. Despite the simple setup, "Grizzly Park" is still a decent watch.
Lions? They eat meat. Lots of it. They pride themselves on chasing down prey in the wilds of Africa. If you're a big pile of idly standing meat? Chances are, you're going to get eaten.
Frogs are scary, right? Right? While the basic setup is downright laughable, the end product of this 1972 movie turns out to be... also downright laughable. Mix in some badly acted southern belle characters and a few rednecks and you've got yourself a hoppin' party!
Earthworms are pretty gross to the touch. They're slim and squiggly and generally seem pretty unnatural. So imagine all that crawling through your face! Throughout years of experimentation, I've yet to get an earthworm to eat people after giving it an electric shock but then again, I've never had fallen power lines to work with either. "Sqirm" was also the subject of a pretty fantastic episode of "Myster Science Theater 3000".
We've all heard of this film but for myself, it earns a special spot in my horror list. This is the first film that required me to watch it from a separate room, peaking around the corner. Screw spiders man, those things are nasty!
Were-sheep and zombie sheep? What more do you need aside from some man-on-sheep freaky deaky? Well guess what? That's in there too. Thankfully, for as absurd as the film sounds it is actually quite entertaining. Except for the man-sheep love.
The sight of a school of piranha eating weekend revelers and their inner tubes is indeed quite entertaining, but at least the fish are contained to the river. I can't imagine what would happen if Piranha could fly!
Night of the Lepus
Mother Nature has spawned many frightening creatures to haunt our nightmares and stalk us down in the dark of night. None of her creatures have ever topped the sheer terror of her mutant rabbits though. Don't bother with the carrots, these bunnies aren't interested.
Where else can you find an epic film starring both Elisabeth Shue and an Orangutan? To make it even better, they put clothes on the ape! As far as I'm concerned, there is little more entertaining than apes in people clothes.
We've wronged the Indians throughout our history and Tim Okeechobee, the black haired white guy has had enough. Meet his fork-tongued hissing brand of vengeance named..... Stanley.