joss whedon

Warner Bros. has confirmed they will be in fact moving forward with a "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" reboot and one Mr. Joss Whedon will have absolutely nothing to do with it. I have to say once I googled Joss Whedon and found out he's the guy that made the Buffy show I never watched I was enraged! Wait no, neutral, I was neutral... sorry.

Do you have "Black Swan" fever? Me too! Here's a new music video for the film that highlights the fact that it's a movie about ballet and that I'm pretty sure no one has a freakin clue what the hell this film is about. Swans, I assume something to do with swans.

"Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale" is Finnish and is about an evil Santa Clause so in turn it is frightening as hell. Nothing could be more frightening than a bunch of angry people screaming in whatever language they speak in Finland while Santa slaughters everyone. To prove this point there's some new photos for your to crap your pants over.

Finally here is the news you've all been waiting for, "Sleepaway Camp IV: The Survivor" is complete and there's a new poster for the film. Spoiler alert though, Joss Whedon has absolutely nothing to do with this film. This guy can't catch a break. Well best of luck Jossy, hope things turn around for you.

Let's start the news this morning with a well-deserved laugh: the new Fangoria blog. LOL. Oh, how the mighty have fallen! Some people say that this ultra-basic blog is the death-rattle, some people say it's a possible rebirth. I kinda hope it's like a guy who's been in a serious car-wreck and has severe brain-damage, leaving him a drooling imbecile who has no real motor functions but is still, sadly, barely alive for years and years, becoming a drain on their friends and family who secretly wish that he would just die so they can move on with their lives, causing brutal inner turmoil inside them because they know that it's wrong to think of their loved one like that. Kinda like that.

Over at Dread Central, they score a nice coup with a short interview with Rider Strong, star of Cabin Fever and, more importantly, Boy Meets World. And while he does a serviceable job discussing the Cabin Fever legacy, not once do they ask him about motorboating Topanga's big fat juggs. Seriously...face aside, I could plant a flag on that pasty chest and proclaim it as the property of Spain. My God...did you see her in National Lampoon's Dorm Daze? That movie gave me arthritis, if you know what I mean.

Five-headed mangina Joss Whedon and hipster documentarian Morgan Spurlock are teaming up to make what is going to be the most ironic, annoying and patronizing documentary ever about the San Diego Comic-Con. Let's place bets right now that the man-mammed Whedon stuffs the thing with scantly-clad “Slave Leias” and then uses some sort of pseudo-feminist BS to make viewers think that what they're watching isn't Maxim-level jerk-off material. Meanwhile, Spurlock will comb his handlebar mustache with a PBR can.