david cronenberg

David Cronenberg has decided his glowing smile needs to be seen by the world so he has taken the leading role in a new film titled "Body Art". The film follows a woman who goes into hiding after the suicide of her husband only to discover a man living with her that can repeat every conversation she ever had with her husband. I know I know, same old story we've seen 100 time already. But hey, maybe they'll do something new with it.

I don't know how something like this happens but apparently there is a "Jeepers Creepers 3: Cathedral" in the works and it might hit theaters as early as June 1st of this year. I've never seen the other two films so I'm a little confused but apparently this one follows a woman who sets out to end the Creeper's killing spree once and for all. I'm guessing that is going to be the plot of every one of these movies going forward but let's just go with it.

If you've never seen the 1968 mind F classic "Barbarella" then I suggest you get off your lazy ass and go pick up a copy of it post haste. It'll help prep you for the small screen adaptation that "Drive" director Nicolas Winding Refn currently has in the works. What's more is the show has just landed Neal Purvis and Robert Wade, the guys who wrote the last 5 Bond flicks have been confirmed to write. Jane Fonda may hate America but if 1968 Jane Fonda told me to move to Canada and start worshiping maple syrup I'd probably do it.

While there's no way in hell it'll stay that way it looks like the "Evil Dead" remake was slapped with an NC-17 rating when it was thrown in front of the ratings folks. A cut version is apparently already being worked on but this gives us all hope for the unrated DVD that will most likely be thrust out. Thrust is a really uncomfortable word.

Get excited folks! Robert Rodriguez and Frank Miller have dropped the bomb that production on "Sin City: A Dame To Kill For" will begin this summer. No specific details on the plot or when the film will see the light of day but aren't you just excited that it's happening? You couldn't stand up right now even if you wanted to could you? God you're sick.

Speaking of The Rock... Dwayne "My Man Crush" Johnson has been tapped to take on the lead role of the upcoming big screen adaptation of "Lore". Based on the comic book of the same name the story will tell the tale of a man who reluctantly becomes a member of a secret order of dream boats who battle mythical beasts. The "dream boat" part I added. Don't judge.

Word around the tubes is that none other than Mr. David Cronenberg is high atop a short list of directors to take on "Catching Fire", the much anticipated sequel to "The Hunger Games". Gary Ross who directed the first installment recently parted ways with Lionsgate due to the short filming schedule so now they're on the prowl. I mean if I was looking for a guy Cronenberg wouldn't be my first choice but I don't like to judge. The Rock isn't free though? Just wondering.

This isn't very exciting news but I wanted to share it with you because it makes me happy. "Alfred Hitchcock and the Making of 'Psycho'", the movie about the making of "Psycho", seriously it is, has had its title cut down to just "Hitchcock" and begun production. Don't you feel better about the world now?

Some more details on what we can expect from season 2 of "American Horror Story" are flooding the tubes. It looks like Ryan Murphy, the shows creator, is on the hunt for a Angelina Jolie in "Girl Interrupted" to battle with Jessica Lange in the upcoming season. I've never seen that movie but I do own a copy of "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" and if it's anything like that I think we've got a winner.

Oh boy oh boy! Showtime has officially dropped the premier date for season 7 of "Dexter" and what a date it is! September 30th. Isn't that a good date. Just turning to Fall time. The leaves are beginning to turn. People are starting to think about Halloween. I hope to be down two pant sizes by then. It's really going to be magical.

I don't know why but I always assumed David Cronenberg didn't even own a TV. Maybe he doesn't actually but he's working on a new show called "Knifeman". The series is a medical drama that follows the happening of a radical self-educated surgeon. Cronenberg will direct the pilot and play the producer role for the series. No word on what station this one will be on but I can't imagine Fox Family is going to pick it up.

I have no idea how to pronounce Karel Roden's name but he's been cast as a mad scientist in the upcoming film "Frankenstein's Army". The movie takes place towards the end of the second World War and finds the Russian army uncovering a creepy breed of living dead monsters that fight for the Nazi's. Sounds adorable.

A Dangerous Method

In the newest Sophisticult Cinema, find out which John was a fan of Cronenberg's latest, and which felt like he was getting a metaphorical spanking.

I can't really keep up with what movies are actually filming right now and which ones are riddled with production issues. It's not like I write about this crap every day or something. But it looks like "World War Z" is in fact full steam ahead. Proof of this can be found in the boat load of new on set videos that have hit the tubes showing all kinds of zombie action in the outbreak flick. Check em out because Star A walks off the set because Star B screwed his girlfriend in the trailers during lunch break.

Ladies and gentlemen I present to you the first poster for "Seven Below". A group of people trapped in a haunted house during a freak storm sounds like the thing Hollywood dreams are made of. But the kicker? The film stars Val Kilmer and Ving Rhames. Double V! Not going to lie I've had terrible nightmares that involved being trapped in a house with Val Kilmer. There wasn't any ghosts though. it was just him drinking JD and screaming "I was Batman god damn it.... BATMAN!"

David Cronenberg makes movies people like so it only stands to reason that his son, Brandon would too. That's just logic, folks. So young master Brandon will be taking on "Antiviral", a odd story that revolves around a clinic that has begun replicating celebrity diseases and the salesmen who becomes obsessed with one particular strain. A story we can all relate to.

So they're going to make a couple more "Cabin Fever" movies. "Cabin Fever: Patient Zero" and "Cabin Fever: Outbreak" are both set to begin filming in the Dominican Republic sometime next year, one taking place on a boat and the other on a Caribbean island. I'd like to speak directly to the fine people of the Dominican Republic now. I visited your fine country a few years back while I was on my Honeymoon and during my 35 minute taxi ride to the enclosed resort my wife and I were staying at I couldn't help but notice your numerous armed service men wandering the dirt roads. I'll let you fill in the rest.

Another day another "Paranormal Activity 3" clip and man oh man check this one out. There's a girl sleeping and then... well I think there might be something in the doorway? I have no idea what the hell is going on honestly. But I know it's frightening as hell. I think. 99% sure that's what it is.

Kevin J. Foxe is credited as being an executive producer for "The Blair Witch Project" which I assume means he was in charge of finding the perfect sticks to make those weird dolls. Or at least finding someone to go do that for him. Well now he's bringing all that talent to the directing role of a new spooky ghost story involving a group of college students title "The Ghost Experiment 3D". Can you guess if it's going to be in 3D or not? If you guessed no you are wrong... and really stupid.

Here's some news you didn't see coming. Sherri Moon Zombie is going to star in "Lords Of Salem" which is currently being directed by her lover Rob Zombi. If I was a betting man I'd put my money on her playing a freaky deeky who screams a lot and gets naked. That's just me though. She's actually been confirmed as a radio DJ who unleashes a coven of witches from days of yore. So probably not a lot of stripping there.

In a recent interview Mr. David Cronenberg alluded to the fact that he has already written a sequel to his 1985 remake of "The Fly". While there's no actual discussion of the film being made it looks like there's a god possibility it could go into production sometime in the near future. He spent the rest of the interview talking about this season's "Dancing With The Stars". It got kind of weird.

This week it's time for Jon's staff pick, David Cronenberg's "Shivers". We talk about orgies, parasites, and Disco Stu...