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How to Kill the Zombie Subgenre

John Shelton's picture
Submitted by John Shelton on Tue, 09/23/2008 - 16:45.


Step 1: Take a bunch of "So You Think You Can Dance?" rejects and dress them in half-assed zombie makeup and costumes.

Step 2: Have them wander around Universal Studios, occasionally breaking into a dance routine to Flo Rider. Don't worry about "zombie-ing" up the moves. This ain't the Thiller video.

Step 3: Add Kathie Lee Gifford and the Today Show.

Final Score: Shark 1, Zombies 0

Related Content: 
Please Kill the Zombie Subgenre
John Shelton's picture

Bonus Footage

Submitted by John Shelton on Tue, 09/23/2008 - 16:51.

If you stick around until the end of the video you'll be treated with some raw feed of an incredibly strange dance party featuring zombies, the Simpsons, Shrek, Curious George and a few mummies. Whoops, scratch that- on closer observation there's only one mummy. Sorry about that, Kathie Lee.

Christine's picture

:-(

Submitted by Christine on Tue, 09/23/2008 - 16:51.

That made me insanely mad.
Zombies and apple bottom jeans don't mix.

mark's picture

Thank you for pinpointing

Submitted by mark on Tue, 09/23/2008 - 16:57.

Thank you for pinpointing the exact sort of shit I was talking about! If anything can be taken from this, I may now finally be able to see/make the film "Apple Bottom Zombies." Coming in 2009!

Amazonagent's picture

Regoddanmdiculous!

Submitted by Amazonagent on Tue, 09/23/2008 - 17:22.

What a bastardization of MJ's Thriller dance. While I would love to see the Halloween Horror Nights they have in the parks, I would totally mush my funnel cake in to the face of one of those zombie dancers. >_<

-Tanya
Catchin' bullets with her teeth since 1977

Prisoner Abel's picture

Obvious;y

Submitted by Prisoner Abel on Tue, 09/23/2008 - 20:19.

The best way to kill the zombie subgenre is to just shoot it in the head. That's how you kill a zombie anything.

"I like it when they lie still like that."

head_shot's picture

you've gotta admit, that

Submitted by head_shot on Tue, 09/23/2008 - 22:03.

you've gotta admit, that blonde haired zombie was pretty fuckin' scary looking...

oh wait that was Kathie Lee Gifford.

Aim for the head-!!

Eric's picture

Orlando stories

Submitted by Eric on Tue, 09/23/2008 - 22:24.

OH MY MOTHER FUCKING GOD.

That literally made me stick to my stomach.

As someone who attended Horror Nights in Orlando last year, I can assure you that none of this mess goes on down here. They just make everything dark and spooky, crank up the fog machines, give assholes chainsaws to run around and scare people, and put together some cool haunted houses.

The fantastic thing is walking around the fake city streets that are set up there year round, only at night and with spooky music playing and weird costumed people walking around everywhere. It was literally one of the greatest experiences my inner man-child has ever had.

There were these giant scary ass people who had costumes on and were on stilts. And anyone who showed any fear whatsoever got chased. So literally I saw a girl run past me screaming, turned around, and saw a 12 foot succubus on stilts barreling towards me. I literally almost pissed myself.

My girlfriend was so freaked out that she refuses to go with me again this year. So I may make a three hour trek to Orlando and walk around by myself like a creep. Hey, I owe it to you guys, right?