Mutilate Your Thirst

Horror Headlines 5/7/08

80's Man-God Tom Atkins has been cast in the 3D remake of "My Bloody Valentine"! I now officially take back everything bad I've ever said about this film. Tom freaking Atkins? Where did they dig him up from?

So, one of the original writers of "Robocop" now is referring to the next film as "Robocop 4" and not a "remake". Not sure if that's wishful thinking on his part, but that and more thoughts on the series can be found at the link.

Pay attention, Louis. The Scifi channel just finished filming a flick in Australia titled Goblin Shark Attack. Hey, amazing titles speak for themselves people.

Here are some synopses and casting lists for "Fear Itself", to debut on NBC this summer. NBC is taking a huge risk with this show, so it should be interesting as to how it pans out sans the R rating afforded by The Showtime network.

Frank Miller's "Spirit" has been moved up to December 25th, showing that Lions gate is feeling confident about Miller's directorial debut. The film, based on a popular comic strip, goes like this: "A slain rookie cop who returns from the dead to fight crime and track a cold-blooded killer." Sounds good to me!

International "X-Files 2" Poster. I'm ready for the hype train on this to stop until it's release, but I know we have a few resident fans so I'm just doing my part for ya.

In Real People News: 

A South Jersey cop has been sentenced for an incident in 2006 in which he forced a cow to give him fellatio. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's the only time you'll see all those words in the same sentence together. Oh, and ewww.

Police were less shocked by the 30 cats in Michael Vondueren's home in Sacramento when they busted in recently, as they were about the 300 dead cats in his freezers. I can't fathom actually wanting to own ONE cat, so you can imagine how much I relate to this story.

A judge hearing a case brought by the RIAA regarding the use of "Shared Folders" on your computer has ruled that it is not unlawful to store music in a shared folder on your computer, effectively setting a precedent that may kill many suits brought on by the recording industry cartel. The good news is you can now continue to share those Weird Al tracks of yours unencumbered. Rejoice!

On this day in history: 

1915: The ocean liner Lusitania is torpedoed by German submarine U-20 off the coast of Ireland. The ship goes under in just 18 minutes. In their panic, the crew only manages to launch 6 of the 48 lifeboats. As a result 1,201 are killed. Contrary to published reports of the time, the passenger ship was smuggling 3,863 boxes of ammunition and 323 bundles of guncotton into Britain.

Box Office Special - Unassailable Iron Man

Welcome to Summer. The first real blockbuster is in the books, and boy was it a doozy. "Iron Man" scored with critics and with audiences. While number one at the box and $100 million sounds pretty good, to really understand how well the film did, it's helpful to look at some comparisons.

First, some prominent superhero films by Metacritic score:
Spider Man 2 - 83
Iron Man - 78

Horror Headlines 5/6/08

Terminator 4 is going to be PG-13. Sorry to make your head explode first thing in the morning, but it had to be done. I'm officially over the enthusiasm for this that was forced on me by everyone else.

"The Knights Templar" is about the famous holy warriors fending off an army of invading vampires. Although I'm sure they'll take liberties with the facts (vampires, after all) this concept still satisfies the history buff within me.

Three new TV spots for "The Strangers" just might be what you need to help you get over the first story. Let me know if it works. The home invasion pic starring Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman opens everywhere May 30th (only a few weeks away!).

In Real People News: 

Need another pick me up this morning? How about Saddam Hussein's diaries while in US custody. Apparently he thought he would get AIDs from sharing a clothesline with US soldiers. How adorable!

I'm no genius, but when a Priest gets caught having sex with inmates he's visiting, sending him to prison seems kind of like a vacation, doesn't it? That just seems like bad business.

Man flips off police officer, turns around to pop a wheelie, and then crashes his bike. This was all after he (presumably) screamed, "screw you bacon!"

On this day in history: 

1937: Zeppelin Hindenberg explodes at Lakehurst NJ, leaving 36 dead and others seriously burned. The video of the Zeppelin crashing may be the world's first viral video, and spawned the infamous line, "Oh the humanity!"

Mario Kart Wii

Last week saw the release of many peoples justification for owning a Wii; Mario Kart.

Released on every Nintendo Platform made since the Super NES, Mario Kart as been THE pinnacle of cartoon kart racing. There's hasn't been a whole lot of others mind you, but for what there is, none hold a candle to this little Italian plumber and his lead foot.

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